Some people would say parents are over-ambitious for their children today. These people would no doubt point out the intense competition among parents for their children to have top scores, be enrolled in top classes, go to the top schools, and receive top recognition. Almost all of us know these parents. They have mapped out their children’s lives from pre-school through college. These parents push their children, push their teachers, push their coaches, push their tutors, they push, push, push. Only the top and the best is acceptable.
While I appreciate their love for their children and their strong work ethic, I have two concerns. First, I am concerned about the amount of strain that is put on children and the family with the stress to always be number one. Childhood should be a fun time, a time filled with happy memories and carefree days. It should be a time of exploring and discovering the world, and the many beauties of God’s creations. My second concern is much bigger. It is the question of “why”. Why is it so important to have children that are number one at everything?
It remains a mystery to me that very few of these parents take the time to dissect the reason behind their own motivations. Perhaps some will say they want their children to “have it easier than they have”, or some say they want their children to have the advantages to be able to realize all their dreams. To all of these, I still have to ask, “why”, “to what end”?
Do we want our children to spend most of their lives preparing for careers, which may or may not be satisfying? Are we raising children so driven that they will sacrifice their own family time, sacrifice time with their children? Do we want our children to put success and the rewards it brings above everything? These are things I strongly encourage all parents to ponder, to weigh in their hearts. Are parents being driven by what they see and read from peers and educational institutions? Please do not let the parenting style of others affect yours.